A Kitten Introduction - The Wilbourn Way - Carole Wilbourn
Carole Wilbourn, The Cat Therapist, has been the leading voice in feline therapy for over 5 decades. She has helped thousands of cat moms and dads explore, face, and resolve cat behavioral and health issues. Carole is truly the most trusted Cat Therapist in the United States.
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A Kitten Introduction — The Wilbourn Way

Jesse’s Home Saved By The Right Kitten And Intro

Lester the kitten was Jesse’s savior

Take a look at The Wilbourn Way to introduce a new kitten to your cat.

A kitten introduction is usually a piece of cake because a kitten is so very flexible in temperament and behavior. Size-wise, a kitten is less threatening than a grown cat. Many times I will arrange to do the introduction if the guardian wants my guidance. One of my favorite introductions was the introduction of a male kitten to a young white cat named Jesse. Sally, his guardian, had adopted him from the ASPCA. The next day when he cornered and nipped her, she returned him. But that night she couldnít sleep.

So handsome

A Second Chance
The following morning Sally went back to the shelter with the hope that someone would have a solution. She was given my name and called when she and Jesse returned home for the second time.
“Carole, Mickey from adoptions at the ASPCA told me you made house calls and you’re my only hope. I can’t take Jesse back to the shelter,” she said.  So I fitted Jesse into my schedule that evening.

Jesse’s Session
Sally answered the door with Jesse right behind her.
‘What a handsome white cat!” I said.
Jesse’s tail circled and he stretched out on the rug in response. Sally told me how one minute she’d be petting him and he’d be purring.  Suddenly he’d start to nip.
“He becomes over-stimulated. His calm energy accelerates and he goes into fast and furious mode,” I said.
“So what do I do?”
“You stop petting him when his back ripples, ears flatten or tail flicks,” I said. “Sometimes too much contact is too much!”
As my mellow music started playing, Jesse’s tail flicked a few times, his ears briefly twitched, he closed his eyes and rolled over to a softer spot on the rug. Sally told me that before I arrived he was racing all about and she was tossing his toys to keep him occupied. “He was going non-stop like there was no tomorrow,” Sally said. “But at least the toys were his target and not me,” she added. “Only I can’t keep this up. I’d need a clone.”
“No, a kitten,” I said.
“Really, you mean another cat? Suppose he mirrored Jesse’s behavior, I’d have double trouble,” said Sally.
I explained that now Jesse was treating her the way he would treat another cat. He wouldn’t be threatened by a kitten, and he’d have one of his own species to work out his boundless energy.
“But wouldnít he hurt a kitten? He’s so big and …”
“Don’t worry, Sally, there’s a way to do it,” I said. “You can do it the Wilbourn Way.”
“Shoot,” Sally said.

The Right Match
I told Sally that a three-four month old, very playful, sturdy kitten would be the best match for Jesse. Gender was not an issue.
“But won’t he be jealous if I walk in with a kitten?” Sally asked.
“Not if the kitten’s escort is someone whom Jesse hasn’t befriended,” I said.
“Ah, the plot thickens. Please continue,” said Sally.

Introduction Of A Kitten To A Cat — The Wilbourn Way

  • Sally leaves the door unlocked for the escort.
  • While Sally and Jesse hang out in the bedroom, the escort deposits the kitten in his carrier in the bathroom with the litter box nearby.
  • The escort opens the carrier, leaves the bathroom door very slightly ajar and departs — does not hang around.
  • Sally opens the bedroom door after hearing the escort leave, tells Jesse she’ll see him later and LEAVES.

“But, oh my, Jesse and the kitten will be alone together. Don’t I need to supervise?” said Sally.
“No way,” I said. “The kitten needs to be Jesse’s find. You don’t want your doubts and fears to cloud or influence their meeting. The kitten should be Jess’ís discovery,” I said.
“But how long must I stay away? How soon could I return?” Sally asked.
“After three or four hours,” I said.
“I don’t think I could handle that. What about if you did the introduction?” said Sally.
I told Sally that if I did the introduction, because I would be present, she could stay but after about an hour we would both leave.
“You really think a kitten is the solution?”said Sally.
“Yes indeed,” I said and went on to tell Sally I’d be in touch with the ASPCA, where she’d adopted Jesse, to inquire about a kitten.

Introduction of Jesse’s Kitten
Within a week, a white kitten was located. Sally arranged to pick up the kitten, and I met her in the lobby of her building. I instructed Sally to go up ahead, leave the kitten with me and to hang out with Jesse in the bedroom. After Sally got into the elevator, I unzipped the Sherpa carrier. A white, husky kitten looked up at me and let out a loud meow. As I stroked his head and told him how cute he was, I felt certain he was the perfect match. Size-wise, he was big enough but small enough not to threaten Jesse. His white coloring would be a familiar and welcome scent to Jesse, as a cat sometimes determines color by its scent.

A rascal

I entered Sally’s apartment and went straight to the bathroom where I unzipped the carrier, left the door slightly ajar and joined Sally with Jesse in the bedroom.
“Jesse ran to the door when he heard you but I’ve been able to distract him with his toys.” Sally said.
“Good going,” I said as I leaned down to stroke Jesse.
He glanced my way and headed towards the door. The music from his session was playing, and he turned to look at Sally as he heard his name.
“Jesse is certainly name sensitive,” I said as I opened the door and Jesse barreled out.
“Oh, my God,” said Sally. “What will Jesse do?”

Love At First Sight
“Not to worry, Sally,” I said. “I’ll take a look and be right back.”
Sally gave me a distressed look so I threw her one of Jesse’s toys and made my way slowly to the bathroom. The kitten was perched on the rim of the bathtub. Jesse’s tail twitched and he let out a “give-me” meow. With one leap, he was beside the kitten and gave him a lick on the head. The kitten closed his eyes and stood still for Jesse to give him another lick .

Ignore The Kitten
“Well Sally, they’re a match,” I said and gave her the update.
“Oh, I want to see them,” Sally said.
“Slow down,” I said and gave her a few pointers. I told her that we would go into the living room and sit down. She should only interact with Jesse. If the kitten came her way, she should look the other way.
“Why, that’s cruel!” Sally said. “The poor kitten will feel abandoned.”
“Sally, no, because Jesse will be there for him. I want their relationship to be solid before you befriend the kitten,” I said.
“So how long will that take?”

Ten Days From ….
“Not long because Jesse already accepted him,” I said.
As we sat down in the living room, I explained that Jesse’s affectionate licks to the kitten marked his approval so TEN DAYS from now she could actively reach out to the kitten — as long as she included Jesse verbally.
“How so?” Sally asked, as Jesse chased the kitten across the rug, and the kitten chased Jesse.
I told her that whenever she interacted with the kitten, she could say: “I’m feeding the kitten so you don’t have to do it” or “I’ll brush him for you.”  In the meantime she should only do what was absolutely necessary for the kitten but also to mention Jesse so he felt included and not excluded.  If Jesse felt neglected, he would resent the kitten.

Cat Sense — Kitty Radar
“Okay, Carole, but what if Jesse can’t see me?”
“Doesn’t matter. He can sense your contact with the kitten — even if you whisper or say nothing,”  I said. With that the kitten jumped into Sally’s lap.
“Oh my God, what do I do now?” Sally said.
I told Sally to tell Jesse how handsome he is. As she talked to Jesse, he rolled over on the rug. The kitten jumped down and joined Jesse. Sally leaned back on the couch and clapped. “It works! My goodness, it actually works.”
“Yes,” I chuckled, “and I have a feeling these two are going to be the best of friends.”

Time out

The Kitten Is Invisible
“Do you have any last minute pointers for me?” said Sally.
“Yes, The kitten is invisible to you. So zero attention except for when you have to feed him and any other must-do tasks. But grab your keys, and say goodbye to Jesse.”
“But shouldnít I say goodbye to the kitten?”
“No,” I said. “Remember, he’s invisible.”
“Jesse will take care of him, Jesse will take care of him,” Sally repeated as we walked to the elevator.
I reminded her to stay out for at least three hours. She revealed that she didn’t think she’d be able to stay away so long but now she felt confident she could. “Yes, and I’ll only have eyes for my Jesse when I get home,” said Sally.

Post-Introduction Pointers
Sally called that evening to ask me what to do about bedtime? Jesse always slept with her. What should she do if the kitten joined them?
“If Jesse doesn’t object, fine,” I said, “but remember ….”
“I know, the kitten’s invisible, ignore the kitten,” Sally said.
I added that if Jesse refused to sleep with her because of the kitten, she could put the kitten in the bathroom. If this upset Jesse, she should close her bedroom door, tell Jesse good night and he was on his own.
“I see,” said Sally, “this will give them more time together. But I’ll miss Jesse.” She was also worried about leaving them alone when she went to work the next morning.
I reassured her that they’d be fine. “The more you’re out, the more time they have together without your angst.”

Within the next week Sally called with a few more questions. What should she do when she had company and what about the cat sitter? I told her they should adhere to the same plan. But if she thought visitors would upset the prescription, she could do the visiting until the count-down was over. It should be easy as there were only a few more days left.

The Perfect Relationship
A photo of Jesse and his kitten arrived in the mail several days later. It was labeled Jesse and his kitten Lester — the perfect relationship!

“Well isn’t that the tie that binds or better yet — bonds” I said to Orion, who was scratching one of his posts as part of his evening exercise and pedicure. He responded with a few more dramatic scratches. I had raised my voice to talk to him which inspired the extra enthusiastic scratching.